Decidere: What it means to decide

By Westermack W. Batanyita

I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm— neither hot nor cold— I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”— Revelation 3:15-16.

Decisions, decisions, decisions...we all make them every passing moment of everyday: be it something simple enough as either to leap out of bed or continue slumbering as the alarm goes off, or something a little more involved as deciding to enter into a committed relationship with someone or not. They are all decisions. They are a critical part of our lives as every action is preceded by one. Being the mother of all action, decisions direct our lives; who we were, who we are, and who we become rest on them. But what’s a decision really, anyways!?

Simple enough the meaning of “decision” for most people, except that the notion on what it means to decide in our societies is, well, loose! And in our loose application of the term “decision” in our daily lives, an overwhelming majority of us haven’t a clue on what it means to really make a decision.

The word itself— decision, derives from the combination of two Latin words “de”, which means “from”, and “caedere” which means “to cut”. Making a true decision is to commit yourself to achieving the result you expect from that decision, and cutting yourself off from any other possibility other than that result.

The simple fact is, in our minds at least, whenever we make a decision, we cross a bridge connecting where we currently are and where we expect that decision to take us. And, as it follows from the Latin antecedents of the word, the bridge has no other helpful purpose upon having crossed over to the other side. In fact, if anything, it can only serve to detract from the force of change that a committed decision creates, and should therefore be obliterated: effectively cutting ourselves off from any possibility of retreat via it.

Not to overly simplify things but, in essence, cheating in “committed relationships” occurs as a direct result of people “deciding” to enter into them without ever being committed to their decisions! They have in effect failed to completely cut themselves off from the possibility of other carnal retreats— no pun intended.

Etymologically speaking, therefore, decisions entail commitment, a sturdy resolution on the part of the decision maker to see it through.

It's only in the wake of such commitment that life begins to take more magical, almost mystical twists and turns toward materializing the other side of the bridge. All manner of unforeseen people, events, material assistance, circumstances...you name it, will spring forth to your aid in your lofty quest. As Johann Wolfgang von Goethe ably observed the mysterious ways of the force behind a committed decision: “...Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too...”

“...then Providence moves too...” Yes indeed! We are a universe governed by laws of nature, and one of them is this. Our lack of comprehension of their exact mechanics doesn't make them any less pervasive, any less eternal, or immutable, or true; like the force of gravity which even before Newton and Einstein had peered into and helped demystify, had still orchestrated the impeccable dance of celestial orbs of the cosmos since the dawn of time. Fathom them or not, they remain forever alive in the very fabric of Nature; and we may as well tune into the rhythm of their song and dance to it, only to, in the end, have them dance to the tune of ours.

Perhaps no where I know (other than in the indefatigable journey of the invention of the incandescent light bulb) is the authority of this law more evident than in the ubiquitous narrative of Caesar’s military expeditions of the 1st century BC.

His mythic charisma and leadership spirit had just inspired another one in a string of successful military campaigns under his command. Having sailed over the English Channel from Gaul, and landed with his legions on the shores of what is now England, the decision was definitive in Julius Caesar's mind: they were here to conquer, nothing less.

To reinforce his army's commitment on that decision, he did something that I'm sure would have seemed foolish and foolhardy in the eyes of any cynic standing on the sidelines of history-in-the-making; oblivious, of course, to the fact that s/he wouldn't make even the footnote of this history.

Under his command, standing with his soldiers on the chalk cliffs of Dover, looking down over the waves two hundred feet below, they witnessed red tongues of fire consume each and every ship in which they had crossed. They burned their boats— literally! In the enemy's country, with the link with the Continent destroyed, the very last means of retreat burned, there was only one thing left for these men to do: to advance, to conquer. And the rest as they say is history.

I know; what I write here isn't science. To the practical and categorize-it fanatic it's philosophy, too naive, too passive, too removed from the world of real things. To me, given my experience that has woven this nascent tapestry I call my life, it's a belief; one that has calcified into a conviction over the years.

In more recent years, I’ve had to fight a little battle of my own; a battle of wills between who I am as an individual as governed by my convictions which influence my decisions, and the person I’m expected to be by my family, friends and colleagues as governed by popular opinion.

For between my evidently inconceivable decision to drop out of uni, and my free-willed choice to quit a lucrative business that paid me thousands of dollars a month in income and royalties at a relatively tender age of 20, and my other like, rather unorthodox ways I’d amassed an appreciable number of unsolicited spokespeople and advisors, each with their own version of twisted, overinflated and below-the-belt facts.

Fearing that I wouldn't be understood even if I tried to, and just failing to see the point of defending my decisions, I found myself just smiling a wry smile and fending off all unsympathetic questions, vilification, criticism, or advice.


I can still remember what they said though.

After dropping out of school and decided to go into business, for instance, most who knew me thought I was joking. After a little while, after it’d become clear that I wasn’t, most still thought I was, well, joking! For those who somehow managed to take me a little more seriously, the “wiser” thing to do, they advised, would have been to continue my studies as I did my business, or at least fill out a standard form along with a letter to the university declaring that I was postponing my studies— all this as a precaution, just incase things didn’t work out with the business!

It was all well-meaning advice except for one problem: my decision was to go into and succeed in business. I’d cut myself off from any other possibility that would give me any result other than this. In my mind, while there might’ve been the issue of “it could take a bit of time to make it,” the just-incase argument was invalid. The precautionary, fall-back-into-cushion uni degree was immaterial.

There may be many factors that contributed to the skyrocketing success of that business, but primary among these was the sheer psychological drive and focus that stemmed from the plain and simple fact that I didn’t have the luxury of “just incase”.

All was good, the money grew better and better, the people were great; until that day I had to reluctantly reach another unpopular decision.

This time, deciding to quit the business that had influenced my terminating my studies in the first place— a successful business that took me close to two years to build, not only made me look foolish but also crazy; a confused kid who hadn’t the slightest idea of what he wanted anymore! But that’s another long story for another time I suppose. Suffice to say though, they weren’t decisions fueled by just conviction, they were also informed; and I’ve remained committed to them to date. And while I’m no better off financially— yet— as a consequence of these decisions, I believe I’m a stronger, much more integral, and better human being as a result of these.

Decisions: They are an incredible force that shape both our singular and shared destinies. Even for those who lead lives of quiet desperation of passive decision making by allowing the circumstances of their lives to control and direct them, that is in itself a decision. Decisions, I’d argue, are an integral part of our existence.

As we’ve seen, once made, they entail commitment; an unwavering faith and determination to see the results we expect from them through.

We are a species consumed by the need for certainty, like the proverbial biblical doubting Thomas, needing to see to believe; yet there will be times, with more valuable and meaningful decisions, when this commitment will mean that we burn our boats and walk by faith as opposed to the more-preferable sight. You cannot really begin to read the next chapter in a book unless you turn the very last page of the one preceding. The chapters in your life are no exception.

And when fear creeps into our only-human hearts, and we begin to feel like we’ve committed too long and the Promised Land seems to be getting even more elusive as we search and would rather turn back to Egypt into servitude of indecision and half-commitment, we should take heart in the experience of men like Thomas Edison and his 9,999 failures and one eventual success on the painstaking invention of the incandescent light bulb; and in the end we’ll know: When we are committed, we’ll either find a way or make one.


If our decisions are informed, we make them when we are level-headed enough, and we believe in them, we should stick by them no matter what, staying flexible in our approach but rigid in our commitment. As a line in a fave movie goes: There’s dignity in being loyal to something you believe in, holding on to it; and above all else, believing without question that it will carry you home.


Now decide. Gracias!